There can be miracles when you believe. Though
hope is frail, it’s hard to kill. Who knows what miracles you can achieve..
When you believe somehow you will.. You will when you believe! This was
my high school soundtrack of drawing the dreams.. and I would like to have a
renaissance of reminiscent of this song as the soundtrack of my life since this
song really gives me so much hope and dream.. Perhaps if I could go back at the
time when I did my part for the selection of Siswa Berprestasi DIY in Bangsal
Kencana, I would sing this song instead of I Have A Dream. I was in my junior
high school that time, I didn’t recognize the song When You Believe yet hehe..
No one else would really understand the gloomy
feeling of a farewell. May be if anyone else had the experience of long
distance relationship or marriage, I do feel the same. No I’m kidding. I have
handled this kind of feeling but not the same thing, it’s a long distance
family-ship for almost 4 years now. Yes, mom and Lili have become part of my
life. No one in my family would understand this feeling. However this makes me
appreciate any thing more than anyone else. I’m pretty sensitive you know. And
I realize that everyone has her own bliss and life challenge that sometimes we
donot even realize.
I
traveled all the way to the airport. I dont know why I did this. I just thought
of this as the only thing I could do. Nothing more. No expectation. I just
thought sometimes a little thing you do is so meaningful for others. That
was what I have felt in my
life when a simple appreciation is more valuable.
Dear Allah, I have been thankful for each
miracle in my life. For all the happiness and sadness.. For the thrill of
struggle, the sweetness of success, as well as the bitterness of failure. It makes my
life alive. Thank you for everyone who comes through my way of life, you have
made my life more meaningful, thanks to anyone throughout my life. Thank you
Allah.
Yesterday I met Ms Mien. She
presented about Toastmaster. I love the way she handled the class. The way she
communicated. I just loved. I wished that each of my class has this atmosphere
of learning, wouldn’t it be more enjoyable? She said, I have a beautiful
English. That impressed me so much. She would say go for it and that motivates
me alot. She reminds me on Mom. And Ibu at a different way but the same meaning.
Having those great women in my life is such the best gift I have ever had.
Today Mr. Zaki told me thru email
about meeting up with Ms Mien. I attempted to arrange the time. Since I had
class since 7am it was too late when I read the email. It was a pretty tight
day and schedule. I just figured out that her flight would be at 4. I rode my
motorbike as fast as I could. I made it by 3.30 at the airport. I would like to
say goodbye and send her wishes with my thank-you note and a lil present. But the time wouldn’t allow
us. She’s in the plane already n will be leaving in 10 minutes. She wouldnt be
able to get out of the plane to see me. But, I’m happy I feel relief that I did
my best that I appreciate her as much as I could.
I went back with a mixed feeling.
I hate my self for having this typical emotion. I’m an introvert but I would do
anything to express my feelings freely. Much of the time, it is such an
embarassing thing. But that is the only way I talk. That is the only way I
express my feeling. I’m not feeling sad and disappointed. I was just happy for
having expressed it on my own way though people would misunderstand me. That’s
what a relief is for me. Theres no medicine for this. I just need to be all by
my self for a self contemplation. I kind of having reminiscent moment of having
farewell with mom and Lili. I was kind of having a reminiscent moment back when
I was enjoying my year in WW with Jade as my best friend, when she suddenly had
to leave me. Yes, her friend in China suicided. The way her friend suicided
made a deep guilty feeling on her. So, she had to see the psychiatrist and
finally figured out that the best way for her was that she had to leave and go
back to China according to the psychiatrist. I was really frustrated. She’s my
best friend. She’s like my own sister in this strange life I have never
imagined. Allah why would you take her away from me and leave myself alone
here? I kept questioning. It was a hard emotional time for me Jade and anyone.
We passed it though. We didn’t see each other for a farewell. It was an
emotional and silent farewell. It wasnt that we ignored each other but it was
that we didn’t have enough courage to say good bye.
Adisutjipto has witnessed so much
memories. I picked Mr. Paul Wouters last time for the seminar. I was so excited
at that time. I brought a bucket of orchids and I knew it was special. Yes,
airport is a reminiscent of memories. It was like a ‘blind movie’ in my life.
Thanks.
This is my thank-you-note. It;s a simple one but I imagined I put it in my hand-made purse. Oh well next time she comes back I'll hand her this souvenir :))
